Are you a victim of caspering? The slow fade of modern dating
Does it seem like the person you're dating contacts you less frequently and inquires less about your well-being? If so, you may have fallen victim to caspering.
6:24 PM EST, December 11, 2023
The gradual fading out without entirely disappearing from each other's lives is characteristic of caspering. If we notice certain signs, it's quite possible we could be experiencing it. The term "caspering" is derived from the friendly ghost in the popular children's cartoon, "Casper the Friendly Ghost". However, it's critical not to confuse caspering with ghosting.
The subtle withdrawal strategy: Avoids direct confrontation
The person who employs caspering intends to end the relationship, but gradually, since they prefer to avoid honest conversation. This is demonstrated by them suggesting meetups less frequently and calling or messaging less and less.
Eventually, they withdraw from us, distancing themselves as much as possible without explicitly stating their intention to end the relationship. This enables them to sidestep taking responsibility for the other person's feelings during this period, when heartbreak and confusion are likely.
Caspering versus ghosting: What's the difference?
Even though the terms may sound alike, caspering and ghosting are fundamentally different strategies. In ghosting, the contact gets abruptly severed. The person who ghosts completely vanishes from our lives as if they never existed. Caspering, on the other hand, is a slow process of gradually distancing two people without declaring a definite end to the relationship.
Ghosting can have significant repercussions. The ghosted person might withdraw from others, develop insecurities, and even struggle with initiating another romantic relationship due to the fear of history repeating itself.
