Are "parallel partnerships" pulling couples apart?
In today's fast-paced world, more and more couples are experiencing a relationship model known as the "parallel partnership." While they jointly manage the home, children, and careers, their relationship becomes purely functional, and a deeper emotional bond and intimacy begin to fade away.
A parallel relationship is one where partners live side by side but rarely connect on an emotional or intimate level. They collaborate as a team to handle daily responsibilities, but they lack the opportunity to build shared experiences, have meaningful conversations, or express their feelings.
The commitment framework
Psychotherapist Rachel Marmor explained in an interview with "Newsweek" that such dynamics can creep into a relationship, especially when partners are juggling the demands of parenting, careers, and running a household. By focusing solely on duties, they fail to notice that their relationship is turning into a purely practical arrangement.
"Every couple needs to figure out how to keep the family going but when the connection between partners is limited to logistics, as if 'Who's picking up the kids?' or, 'Did you pay the bills?', the deeper emotional and physical intimacy starts to fade,," she emphasized.
Psychotherapist Kate Engler, discussing this issue in another interview with "Newsweek," noted that living "in separation" can become routine, especially for couples raising children.
"It appears fair because things are split up between people, but in mixed-gender marriages," she stated.
"This imbalance—and a sense of powerlessness to change it—leads people to parallel partnership," she added.
Why are "parallel relationships" dangerous?
Although it may initially seem that such an arrangement works, the lack of emotional involvement leads to a weakening of the bond between partners. In the long term, this can result in frustration, a sense of loneliness in the relationship, and even its breakdown.
Experts emphasize that emotional and physical closeness are crucial for a healthy relationship. Without them, partners may begin to perceive each other merely as housemates or coworkers, rather than as close individuals to one another.
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